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Backstage with Baldy

Regina – July 6th

Have you ever heard someone over the age of 50 say “I’ve never felt better”.

LIAR!

Of course I’ve felt better. It was called my teens & 20’s.

I’m not 50 yet, and I’m in the best shape I’ve been in since I was a kid, and you know what? I feel like crap.

Let’s face it; you hit a certain point in life, and getting older sucks.

The flip side is that you die, and no one wants to do that.

Getting older, and everything that goes along with it, can be a delicate subject, particularly in this line of work.

I remember my brother giving me the Rolling Stones Tattoo You record for my birthday in 1981, and me thinking that it was a pretty good album, considering that it was made by a bunch of old farts. (Mick Jagger was 38 at the time)

Back then it seemed like unchartered territory for a rock band to keep putting out music and touring when they hit their 40’s.

But now here we are.

The members of Alice In Chains are all on the back side of their mid 40’s, and they’re still going strong.

So what’s my point in bringing up the whole age thing?

Well, two incidents happened last week that made me realize that you’re never too old to piss off the generation ahead of you.

Rock n’ roll has been, and always will be, about rebellion to a certain degree.

The older you get, the more that rebellious streak tends to subside, but the very nature of this job still keeps a bit of that spirit alive.

So last week as Jerry was out participating in the least rebellious activity on the planet (golf), he somehow managed to irk an older lady at the country club.

Long story short, it was a semi-private club, some strings got pulled to allow Jerry and a couple of crew guys to play, a club member felt they were playing too slow, and she decided to give Jerry an earful of unwarranted advice.

Jerry had some advice for her as well (mainly things that would be anatomically impossible), but he managed to follow proper golfing decorum and keep it to himself.

She kept hammering away at him until he finally had enough and told her to shut up, which prompted her to call club security and have someone dispatched to deal with the situation.

Security realized it was a non-issue, and everyone finished up their game and called it a day.

The point is that even with a fresh crisp haircut and proper golf attire, Jerry’s inner rock pig can’t be concealed, and he ended up annoying an elderly lady even though he wasn’t doing anything in the wrong.

She just didn’t like his “type”.

Which is just the way it’s supposed to be.

Next up is Sean, who was at a local mall in Regina when he ran into a few of the guys from Chevelle. They were standing in the entrance to the mall talking when an elderly man came in. They moved out of the way to let him pass when he made a comment about Sean having a ring in his nose. “I do?” Sean replied, which prompted the old guy to call him a smartass among other things, and just like that, a second member of Alice In Chains had angered a second member of the CARP within 48 hours.

I guess the idea behind writing about this is to illustrate that you’re never too old to be considered a snotty punk by someone older than you.

I would imagine that somewhere out there is a 90 year old man who thinks that Mick Jagger and Roger Daltrey are smartmouth whippersnappers who need to get a haircut and a real job.

And there are at least two older Canadians who have similar feelings about Sean & Jerry.

I believe in treating everyone with respect, particularly my elders, but for some weird reason there was an element to these stories that felt mildly comforting to me.

Jerry & Sean were both a bit perplexed by their situations, and neither of them did anything to start it, but hearing them recount their stories made me feel kind of young again.

It makes me want to go back in time, grab my copy of Tattoo You, sneak out of the house, get my older brother to buy me some vodka, and meet the guys at East City Park.

Ah youth…

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Backstage With Baldy

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